Caring for Your Introvert

Caring for Your Introvert

This Atlantic article by Jonathan Rauch is over six years old, but it’s one of the only magazine pieces I have read that liberates me from sometimes feeling like a complete misanthrope. 

Oh, for years I denied it. After all, I have good social skills. I am not morose or misanthropic. Usually. I am far from shy. I love long conversations that explore intimate thoughts or passionate interests. But at last I have self-identified and come out to my friends and colleagues. In doing so, I have found myself liberated from any number of damaging misconceptions and stereotypes. Now I am here to tell you what you need to know in order to respond sensitively and supportively to your own introverted family members, friends, and colleagues. Remember, someone you know, respect, and interact with every day is an introvert, and you are probably driving this person nuts. It pays to learn the warning signs.

Jason Kottke, over on his excellent blog, goes so far as to say that this article is one of his favorite things ever featured on his website.  And that’s saying something.

Key takeaway: the introverts in your life are not narrow, quiet, arrogant loners.  They don’t choose to be this way.  They’re hardwired, just like everyone is to some degree.  As Rauch says:

First, recognize that it’s not a choice. It’s not a lifestyle. It’s an orientation.

Spot-on.

Now, go hug an introvert.  Or at least stop bugging him for a while.

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